When we talk about Awakening, we all know what it means, I assume.

Below is the definition I took from the Oxford Dictionary, and it relates to my own experience: the moment I awake from a deep sleep, the moment I see the world differently with my heart open, the moment I realize and become aware that I’m being aware

From Oxford dictionary

I acknowledge that my true maturity didn’t begin until my 30s. Before that, I was an adult in physical and biological terms, but my mind was still like a child’s within an adult’s body.

The experiences of breakdowns, heartbreak, and failures were incredibly painful, yet they served as keys to unlocking new territories of growth and self-awareness.

The first awakening moment came when I realized I didn’t have to change myself to fit someone else’s standards.

In my first relationship, I kept trying to turn myself into a different version of me because I feared my partner would leave. I wasn’t truly happy but pretended to be. The pain started to grow as I continued to reject my true self while prioritizing others. And “what comes, will come” – my relationship ended after four years. We were both happy and heartbroken. I believe those who have experienced this will deeply understand; I thought I was fine, but I wasn’t. I acted and behaved totally differently than I normally do and couldn’t control my emotions. After several weeks or months (I don’t remember exactly), I looked at myself in the mirror, felt sorry, and loved the person I saw there.

From that moment, I began to learn how to truly love myself, how to treat myself well, and how to prioritize my own needs over others. It was the start of a beautiful journey of self-discovery and self-care.

8 years later, I now find myself thank you to my ex – thank you for letting me go so I could become the best version of my true self

The second awakening came when I realized I had been betrayed by someone I trusted and used for their purposes.

I was an easygoing person, quick to trust others wholeheartedly—Some might call such people naive or even stupid. I didn’t know my core values until I had this experience. When I realized I had been betrayed by someone I trusted and used for their purposes, I was shocked, disappointed, and heartbroken again. This event made me doubt the world and led me to a deeper level of learning: how to build trust with the right people, uphold my standards, and discover my core values. Besides that, I started to learn about the laws of the universe, which opened up a whole new realm of knowledge about karma, life, death, and even helped me confront and name my childhood experiences.

I participated a workshop called – Discover your hidden memory & find the real you” by Dr. Menis Yousry in 2018.

To be honest, this experience threw me into a black hole, dragging me to the bottom of the ocean of depression and shattering me. All the nightmares I had been avoiding came back like bogeymen staring at me from the dark. If I could sum it up in one sentence, I would say: I lost myself in the journey. The only light from that experience was realizing who my true friends were and who weren’t and were and identify my 5 core values TRUST, AUTHENTICITY, COURAGE, CREATIVITY, and FREEDOM.

Six months after the workshop, one morning, I woke up and looked at the roof of my tiny room. The sunlight landed on my face through the window, and the sounds of morning birds and the neighborhood awakened all my senses. I told myself I wanted to live and be happy, to get out of this dark shadow.

From that morning until today, I have continued to embrace my values, keep trusting, and keep giving because I know the law of Karma counts every second. I have learned love from Buddha and Mother Teresa, seeing the world not just through my eyes, but through my heart.

Source - Pinterest

Today, I thank those who brought me pain, for they led me to grow and blossom.

The third and also the recent awakening moment came when I found myself stuck in my current path.

“What go you here won’t get you there” – Marshall Goldsmith

Everything appeared fine, perhaps too fine, and I had become too comfortable. When opportunities arose in the form of challenges, I couldn’t overcome them with what I already knew. I felt stuck, and my response was to blame and complain instead of finding solutions.

But thanks to my core values, I found light in the darkness, these meanings guide me whenever I face tough times:

TRUST – Trusting myself and others became the foundation for moving forward. It allowed me to build meaningful relationships and foster collaboration, even in difficult times.

AUTHENTICITY – Being authentic is a choice that requires practice and consistency in thinking, doing, and acting authentically. It means accepting your vulnerability without fear of abandonment and allowing yourself to be fully present and complete

COURAGE – Courage is about making hard decisions, facing fears of “I’m not enough”, adopting new mindsets, pioneering new paths, and constantly pushing the boundaries. It’s about daring with consciousness and awareness

CREATIVITY – Creativity means never accepting the norm and never settling for “good enough.” There is always a new approach. Creativity is a mindset of thinking and trying new things. As Albert Einstein said, “I didn’t fail 1,000 times. The light bulb was an invention with 1,000 steps.”

FREEDOM – Freedom is about having the autonomy to choose and act. It means being free to make decisions that align with my true self and values.

Continuing from that, I also wrote down answers to the following questions in my notebook:

  • If I don’t make a decision, what will I miss?
  • If I take the opportunity, 2 months from now, will I look back and regret it?
  • How will new perspectives open up?
  • What am I really worried about? (I listed 3 things)
  • How will this decision change my life?

The answer is clear: I accept the challenge and I will overcome it – I may have a lengthy process for making decisions, but once I reach my final decision, I stay committed.

I don’t know exactly how it will unfold or how to deliver on it, but my gut feeling tells me I will regret it if I don’t take this opportunity.

The journey to discover the self, love it, and understand it is a continuous one that lasts until your final breath. It is worthwhile when you find your inner beauty, accept it, and let it shine brightly. I call it the Treasure_YOU

Well, that’s enough for today! Thanks.

Share your thoughts

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked

{"email":"Email address invalid","url":"Website address invalid","required":"Required field missing"}